


Spark (EXTRAS)

by Samaelcholo



Series: Spark [1]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Bad Jokes, Cannibalism, Canon-Typical Violence, Drug Abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempts, M/M, Protective Vaggie (Hazbin Hotel), References to Depression, Self-Hatred, mentions of self harm, shock collars (mentioned)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:35:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26365042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samaelcholo/pseuds/Samaelcholo
Summary: Basically little side stories for Spark because I feel like there were a few bits that got left out or cut. You don’t have to have read Spark but it definitely helps if you did so you know what’s being referenced
Relationships: Alastor/Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Charlie Magne/Vaggie
Series: Spark [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1915927
Comments: 3
Kudos: 42





	1. Doctors visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie takes Alastor to the infirmary after experiencing some negative side effects from the shock collar

Charlie stood in front of the infirmaries door, pacing back and forth down the hallway, arms crossed and brows furrowed. She was a bit shaky, her nerves getting the best of her. Her hands where sweaty and her breaths came out in short spurts as she continued to pace, bile rising in her throat. 

“Charlie, you should sit down.” Vaggie suggested, stopping her with a firm hand on her shoulder, pointing to the small set of chairs just outside the doctors office door. 

She sighed and gave her a small smile, compiling and sitting down. 

“I’m just worried.” She said shakily, looking up at her girlfriend. 

“It’ll be okay, I’m sure Alastor’s fine.”

_Fine_..

It’d been about a year since they’d taken off the shock collar, and everything seemed to be going back to normal, Alastor was much happier, the hotel was flourishing, everything seemed alright again-

but along with the positives, there were always negatives, and though Alastor seemed fine, they all knew that was exactly the case. The collar left some worrisome side effects when it was removed, like his somewhat limited power source, the collar drained ample power from him, and even a year later he hadn’t fully recovered. His neck was covered in electrocution scars, branching down to his collar bone. 

Alastor would often complain of headaches and painful prickling on his neck. Painkillers helped, but only temporarily, and Charlie was nervous about giving him more than the directed amount a day. 

This was the first time in a while they sought out actual medical help, and Charlie was nervous. She knew Alastor was too, and so was Angel and Vaggie. the main reason they waited so long before going to doctor Caynan; the medical professional that works inside the hotel, was because they were scared of what they might find out. Still, Charlie couldn’t stand seeing Alastor in discomfort, even after the collar was removed, so she practically dragged the deer down to the infirmary. 

Now her and Vaggie sat outside the door, waiting for the doctors evaluation. 

Alastor sat on the tall table like bed, his clothes changed into something akin to a hospital gown. The doctor- Dr. Caynan, was sorting a few things out on the counter, writing a few things down on his clipboard, glasses on the end of his nose. 

He was tall, a bit stocky, but no so much so that he was muscular. He was bigger than Alastor, and older. He knew the demon was alive sometime in the 1800s- Charlie has told him, saying he had lots of experience. He couldn’t help but scoff at that. Experienced with what? Bloodletting and influenza? 

He looked to be a sort of cat demon, his shiny black fur a stark contrast to his white coat. His eyes were emerald green and shone dimly behind his small circular glasses. Alastor sighed softly as he looked around the small doctors office. The walls were white and there was a small chair beside the counter where Dr. Caynan stood. The counters were a light blue, and there was a sink along it, with a few white cabinets above it and below 

“Alright, Alastor, I need you to keep your eyes wide for me.” The doctor turned and Alastor’s radio static popped and fizzled at the sudden noise. He kept his eyes open and sat up a bit straighter, glaring at the small light the cat demon held in his hands. 

“I need to check your eyes-“ he held the light up to his pupils and narrowed his eyes as he looked. “-look up for me.” 

He complied. 

“Side to side..” 

Alastor moved his eyes side to side, never blinking. Keeping his eyes open for a long time was never something he had struggled with. 

“Okay.” Caynan set the light down on the counter, grabbing a stick like contraption Alastor wasn’t familiar with and holding it up to his face. 

“Open.” 

The deer paused, looking at him odd before opening his mouth. The doctor stuck the peculiar thing under his tongue and Alastor jumped a bit, not expecting it. 

“Wha-“

“I just need to check your temperature, relax. Keep it under your tongue.” He said, turning and sitting down in his desk chair.

There was loud feedback before Alastor settled down with a sigh, honestly not caring all to much what the doctor was doing. He stared half lidded at the door, longing to just walk out and go to sleep.

The device beeped and the doctor swiveled around in his chair, pulling the thing out of his mouth and looking at it. 

He hummed and turned back to his clipboard, writing down what he saw. 

Alastor blinked, not moving. If he really concentrated, he could almost feel his soft sheets and fluffy pillows. His neck tingled and burned like someone poured peroxide on a deep scrape. Dr. Caynan stood and tuned to him, raising his hand under his chin and lifting his head up with surprising gentleness. Alastor didn’t have the gall to wince as the sharp pain seemingly digging into his flesh, instead, training his eyes up to the doctors, who seemed to be inspecting his damaged neck. Caynan hummed, turning the deers head from side to side to get a good look. 

“This may hurt, and if it does, feel free to say so..” 

Alastor didn’t plan on doing that. Talking seemed like it’d take far to much effort. 

Caynan put two fingers up against one large scar, pushing gently. Alastor winced, letting out a displease sound. The doctor nodded and press his fingers along the outside of the scar, pushing gently once more. Alastor didn’t wince, or make any noise, simply staring at the wall, static buzzing. 

“Does that not hurt?” He asked the demon, raising a brow. Alastor shook his head softly, ears twitching. 

“I see...”

The doctor let his chin go, sitting back down and grabbing his clipboard, scribbling his findings down hastily. 

It felt like time had slowed for Alastor, his head felt foggy and his eyes blurred for a second, but it felt like an eternity for him, making him jolt, ears perked and a record scratch to play loudly. Dr. Caynan looked over. “Are you alright?” He asked. 

Amstel decided he should do something, because not talking a mile a minute like he usually was making him feel a bit slow. He nodded. “Yes, I’m quite alright.”

Caynan nodded, standing up and walking to the deer. 

“I don’t think it’s anything that would need immediate care, but you may have some nerve damage right were the electrical shocks were emitting into your neck, right here-“ the doctor pointed to where the collar would send out waves of shocks through his neck and other his pen.

“It’ll need time to heal properly, because it’s been long enough for the nerve to have time to heal, but not correctly. That’s why you have numbness around the inflicted area and pain in the direct scars. It also explains the headaches and lightheadedness. As for the tiredness, I think you may just be a tad bit lazy.”

Alastor glared at the doctor for the last sentence, sighing and raising a hand to his neck. 

“What will you do then?”

“Prescribe some pain medication and wait. It’s been a year, I’m surprised the nerves haven’t corrected themselves.” The doctor unlocked a small drawer under the sink and grabbed a bottle of pills, checking the label before nodding and setting it aside, writing it down on his clipboard before turning back around and looking at the injured demon, who looked confused. 

“That’s it? That’s what will fix it?”he asked, ears twitching questionably. 

“Well, no. Your power is being used far to often for you to heal.” 

Alastor tilted his head, a bemused smile on his face. The doctor sighed, running his hand along his face. 

“Your using your power before you’ve given yourself time to recover. You use up you magic in some petty turf war and then use it again five minutes later without giving it time to regenerate, you need to give yourself at least half an hour to regain that used up power, or you’ll exhaust yourself. That’s what’s making the healing process falter, your inability to relax and rest. It’s also why you’ve been so reluctant and indolent, your body is being strained of every last drop of magic it holds as soon as you regain even a little bit. You need to stay inside and rest, no turf wars, no fighting, and _no magic_.”

At that explanation, Alastor felt a bit dumb. It made sense, and Alastor had even thought about it himself often, but he’d get distracted with something else and end up using his magic again anyway. Maybe what Vaggie was saying about his short attention span was true. 

“So, what can I do?”

“Sleep. Rest, eat actually foods, not just other demons or jambalaya.”

“One, jambalaya _is_ actual food, a two, there’s no way I’m going to go longer than two days without using my powers. It’s impractical.”

The doctor grabbed his clipboard and the pills and walked to the door, hand on the doorknob. 

“No it’s not. Your going to rest and once you’ve healed you may continue your self deprecating hobbies.” 

“That’s a bit excessive. I wouldn’t say they were self deprecating.” Alastor grinned madly, stepping off the table and walking towards the door. “Maybe in your time you didn’t have fun, old man, dealing with measles and dysentery and such.”

“Shut your mouth or I’ll replace your prescription with cyanide capsules.”


	2. Indifferent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor has an enlightening chat with Rosie after a fight with Vox 
> 
> TW for blood

Alastor limped to the emporium, smile still stuck on his face despite the ache and pain running up and down his body. 

He leaned heavily on the door and knocked, trying to compose himself before his dear friend opened the door. Oh how he hoped that it was just Rosie there, he didn’t want anyone else to see him like this. 

Rosie opened the door with a flourish, smiling at Alastor kindly, taking in his form. 

“Well, what a surprise.” Was all she said before Alastor collapsed in front of her, curling up with a groan. 

“Now now dear, don’t stain my floors with blood. Get up.” 

“What’s goin’ on?” A southern female voice rang out from behind her. Alastor’s ears perked as he struggled to decipher who’s voice it was when Rosie leant down and pulled him up, half carrying half dragging the overlord into the well furnished room, decorated with Victorian era designs. She dropped him on the couch and the same female voice gasped, rushing to fret over Alastor’s weakened body. 

“Dear Lucifer what happened?”

“ _Mimzy_?”

The flapper nodded, helping the deer sit up, leaning on a pillow. 

Rosie sat down on the opposite couch, directly in front of them, a cup of tea in her hand. 

“Are you quite alright?” She asked. 

“Yes. I just need a place to recover, you see, and this just happened to be the closest building.”

“You aren’t hurt, are you?” Mimzy asked, looking at him, her brow creased in worry. Alastor waved her off with a nervous chuckle, not quite comfortable with the closeness. 

“No, no, just a few scrapes, nothing more. This isn’t _my_ blood.” He answered, motioning to his body. 

“Well you should get cleaned up, you’ve tracked blood onto my carpet.” 

Alastor smiled sheepishly and snapped, his clothes being changed to a simple white button up and black slacks, and the floor returning to its former glory. 

“Thank you.”

“So what happened?” The flapper asked, sitting at the end of the couch after moving the deers legs. 

“I had a fight with Vox, _I_ , fortunately, won, but I used an awful lot of power.”

Mimzy nodded and grabbed her cup of tea from the coffee table the teapot and cups sat at. “Would you like some tea sweetheart?  She asked in a motherly tone motioning to the pot. Alastor shook his head dismissively. 

“No, I don’t fancy tea all that much.”

“I’ll go make you some coffee.” She said, patting his leg and standing up, walking over to the kitchen on the other side of the room.

“So.” Rosie started. Alastor groaned. 

“Have you been acclimating well?”

“As well as one could with my predicament.” He sneered, wiping his nosewith his arm and looking away, staring out the window. 

“You know what I’m referring to, deary. It may not seem like it, but I’m awfully worried for you.”

Alastor scoffed and glared at her. 

“Why is that? Because your afraid I’ll go crazy again? destroy the hotel, Kill hundreds of people and then myself? How little do you think of me? Am I really so untrustworthy to even care for myself?” He snapped. 

“That not what I’m saying at all. You insist on twisting my words, we can act like adults, Alastor.”

“I am an adult!” He stood, wincing at the dizzy lightheaded feeling he got in doing so. 

“I can care for myself! I don’t need you, I don’t need Charlie, I don’t need the hotel, I don’t need _anyone!_ ” He growled, antlers branching out wildly. 

Rosie stood, no longer a peaceful look on her face, it being replaced by a look of annoyance. 

“You say that but where did you go when you were hurt? You can’t fend for yourself without magic, and that’s _okay_. Why is that so difficult for you to accept? Is it because your afraid?”

“I don’t know what your talking about-“

“But you do.” Alastor’s antlers shrunk back to normal, the air no longer so thick.  
He stayed silent, looking away.

“Dear, we’ve been _over_ this. This is why you got the shock collar on in the first place. You get upset, disgruntled and you don’t know what to do with that, so you take it out in anger and hurt people you care about, including yourself.”

Al scoffed weakly at that. “I don’t care for myself as I do for the people at the hotel, or you and mimzy.” He mumbled, letting his smile fall. 

“It is okay to feel vulnerable. It’s doesn’t mean your weak, do you understand?”

Alastor nodded, looking up, noticing mimzy standing by the kitchen with a sad expression on her face, Rosie with the same look. 

“I- I think I’ll go now. You’ve given me a lot to ponder. Thank you, both.”

He snapped and teleported himself to the hotel Without giving the women a chance to intervene, Going up to his room. He sighed and collapsed on the bed. 

Strangely, he didn’t feel sad, like he normally would after an exchange like that. Instead he felt light, the ache in his chest a little less overwhelming. 

Confused. That’s what he was. He feared he’d always be confused, always have questions.. but with people who cared about him, people who _he_ cared about, that didn’t seem to bad anymore.  



	3. Glad you were there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor has a run in with Vox.  
> Good thing husk was there.

“That’s not fair.” 

“It’s not my fault you suck at Rock Paper Scissors.” 

“He doesn’t even want to go!”

Alastor pointed a red claw at the gruff winged cat at the bar, a bottle of booze hanging loosely out of his hand. 

“Oh fuck off.” He grumbled, setting the bottle down and sitting up, walking around the countertop and snatching the grocery list from the deers hands. 

“Let’s just get this over with.”

Charlie had given Alastor the simple task of going to the store and picking up some things they needed- and the seemingly straightforward assignment _sounded_ like something he could do on his own, but of course, the princess couldn’t trust him with even the most mundane of chores. 

If he had to go with anyone, it would of course be Angel, but the arachnid was at work, and wouldn’t be back until later that evening. 

His next choice would be niffty, but the little darling was busy zipping around the hotel lobby cleaning up every single speck of dust she saw.   
Charlie and Vaggie had a business trip they needed to go on, and Alastor wasn’t sure what a “ _business trip_ ” entailed, but Charlie insisted on telling him it wasn’t anything he had to worry about. Suspicious, but he wasn’t one to pry. 

Alastor tried making the argument that someone needed to watch the hotel, but Vaggie said it’d be fine.. _right._ Him and Vaggie played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would ultimately be the one to go, and of course, Alastor lost. 

How unfortunate. 

“Don’t get sidetracked! Only buy the things on the list, nothing else!” Vaggie said strictly. 

“Yeah yeah whatever. Let’s go kid.”

Whatever snide remark Alastor had on his tongue was tossed out the window when the cat pulled him out the door roughly.

“Bye you two!” Charlie sang as the door closed. Alastor pulled away and sighed, rubbing his wrist where husk grabbed him.  
“That was awfully rude husker.” He said, looking up when he didn’t get a response other then a grumble of intelligible words. It looked like pentious was out and about, destroying a large amount of buildings a ways away from the hotel. Normally, Alastor would send him running with just a flick of his wrist, but the snake seemed to be doing that well enough on his own, the airship exploding in the red sky and crashing down to the unsuspecting demons below it. He snickered at the display, turning back to husk, who seemed to be scanning the list.

“We should be back in about an hour. It’s not that much stuff.” He said, folding the paper up and stuffing it under his hat. 

Alastor hummed in response as they made their way up to the grocery store a few blocks down from the hotel.

“Well what do we have here.. looks like Bambi and his little kitty friend are out for a stroll~” 

Alastor felt his hair stand on end as the chilling booming voice of Vox rang out. He turned swiftly and smiled wide, his eye twitching. 

“Vox, fancy seeing you here.” He ground out. 

“Yes well I thought I’d pay the west side a visit, it’s quite quaint wouldn’t you say?” The TV overlord reached his hand out to touch the deers face and Alastor grabbed his wrist tightly, giving it a warning squeeze. 

“I’ll break it if you don’t leave right now.” He growled, smile tight and antlers branching out, his eyes switching to radio dials.

Vox chuckled and lifted his other hand, summoning his electrical wires, popping and fuzzy with static. Alastor froze. 

“What?” Vox laughed. He shifted his gaze to husk who stood there shocked, unknowing what to do. 

“ _Cat got your tongue?_ ” He ripped his hand from Alastor’s grip and the deer flinched, radio feedback blaring. 

“You _scared_ Bambi? This bringing back... old memories?”

Alastor took a quick glance around him, noticing most demons had vacated the area. Just like last time. He could already feel the sharp wires surging with electricity, wrapping around his body and shocking him every time he moved, each time he breathed. 

Vox reached for the deers throat as he was thinking, his mind going blank as he panicked and jolted. His chest got tight and his head felt fuzzy, his ears ringing And pinning back as he grabbed Vox’s hand around his throat, immediately thinking back to the wretched collar. He felt his eyes fill with unwanted tears from the lack of air and his panic as Vox spoke. 

“Well well we- **ugh**!” 

The TV overlord crumpled to the ground in pain holding his crotch and Alastor paused, blinking away the tears that had fallen down his cheeks. 

_ What? _

His mind cleared after a second and he looked to husk, who stood there growling and huffing down at the TV demon, his wings flared and face depicting his rage. 

The cat growled fiercely and kicked Vox in the head, making him groan again and curse, his screen cracking as he fell to his side. After Alastor’s shock faded he looked to Vox again and smiled manicly, snapping his fingers, his tentacles rising up and wrapping around the other overlord, squeezing mercilessly. Pops of static and radio feedback rang out loudly making husk wince and cover his ears. Alastor’s antlers branched out wildly and his eyes turned to radio dials once more as he towered over the wheezing overlord. He made quick work of the demon, snapping him in two and tossing him into the large black hole he’d summoned underneath him, closing it up with a flick of his wrist, a large cloud of smoke rising from the carnage. 

With a shaky sigh he tuned back to normal, looking back at the huffing cat nervously. 

“Holy shit.” Husk breathed out, rubbing his face. “I kicked him in the nuts..” husk huffed when Alastor latched onto his side, hugging him tightly. 

“I’m sorry! Thank you husker!”

Husk stood there a moment, processing what the deer was doing and why he was apologizing. Hesitantly, he hugged him back, patting his head, being mindful of his antlers. 

“Yeah, uh, your welcome. Whatever.”

It was true, Alastor couldn’t have took on Vox on his own, not because he wasn’t strong enough, he was plenty strong, but because he wouldn’t be able to stand for himself mentally. Husk was sure if he hadn’t been there Alastor would’ve completely broken down. So.. it was a good thing he was there...

Alastor pulled away and sighed softly. Vox would regenerate, even after Alastor threw him into a never ending pit of darkness. He now knew why Vaggie didn’t want him to go alone, and for that, he was endlessly thankful. He’d be sure to thank her properly for the concern later. 

“I’m sorry I put you in the middle of that, if only I hadn’t froze up-“

“Shut the fuck up. It wasn’t anything you coulda controlled. It’s no big deal. It’s over and done with so let’s go buy this shit before any other people wanna get their nuts crushed.” The cat waved his fist around in mock anger, making Alastor laugh a little. The cat gave him a sliver of a smile and the two made there way into the store. 

“Christ, that really did a number on my back..” husk groaned as they started moving, reaching and putting a clawed paw on his back. “I’m too old for this shit.” 

That made Alastor laugh again and husk smiled a bit more, glad to see the deer in higher spirits. 

It was lucky he was there. 

He was _glad_ he was there. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for typos
> 
> Also I like thinking that sometimes husk puts things under his hat when he doesn’t want to hold them. idk why it makes me laugh lol


	4. Numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie and Alastor have their long delayed talk, and Alastor opens up about things he’s been feeling- or not feeling.

They sat in the garden, the red sky darkening as the day slowly came to an end, the surprisingly cool hell night calming them. They were surrounded by flowers and plants that Her and Niffty had planted themselves, of all colors and sizes. 

Charlie wanted them to talk, but Alastor didn’t want to. He’d managed to put if off and weasel his way out of it for so long, because he really didn’t want to talk about it, about his feelings, about the collar, he just wanted to forget about it all and move on, but he knew ultimately that wouldn’t be possible. This was _Hell_ after all, nothing came easy.

They sat side by side, nothing but themselves in the cool breeze flowing through their hair. 

How many days had it been? How many weeks? It felt so long ago, yet he could remember it all so clearly. The memories of the shocks still made him wince, and he felt ashamed that he couldn’t even be near any electrical devices without panicking.

Charlie has convinced him to come out, just the two of them in the hotels garden. At first he resisted, but it was a bit hard to say no to the joyous princess. 

To his surprise, she didn’t start off by talking about the collar, instead, they talked about their day, what they did, how they felt. It was nice, because Alastor loved to talk. It was something he found difficult to do right after the collar came off, and the weeks following it, because everyone was so careful around him, treating him like glass. He didn’t like that at all.

it wasn’t like he was going to snap or something, he was fine... _mostly_ fine. 

He felt isolated, embarrassed, alone, but Angel was there to comfort him and support him, so he eventually spoke out about how their carefulness was making him feel, and they all started treating him normally, joking around and talking to him like they had before everything happened. 

Husk didn’t really actively listen to his little rants and stories, but he was there to hear parts of it. That’s all Al really needed, was someone to at least be there while he talked, because before mimzy and Rosie and husk and niffty, he’d shamefully talk to himself, just into his microphone, or to his shadows... he didn’t have to do that anymore. Angel listened to him, and would actually engage in conversation with him, and that was nice, but the spider had a job, and was busy.. Alastor could understand that, though he didn’t favor Valentino at all. 

Vaggie would listen too, but only some of the time, and he’d really have to guilt trip her, which surprisingly wasn’t too hard. She’d tell him to shut up eventually, and he would reluctantly, because by that point he’d already felt bad keeping her so long with his pointless talks that nobody really even cared about. No one said that to him, but he knew it was true. He just liked to talk, and before this, he didn’t have anyone to do that with.. 

Charlie always listened. It didn’t matter what it was, maybe a rant, a joke or a story, or just about how he was feeling; which he didn’t do very often.

She was so nice and understanding. It was helpful to talk with her about his troubles, but only when he was feeling truly hopeless. Alastor didn’t know how, but the bubbly princess was wonderful at dealing with traumatized demons. 

Angel would always be the first one he’d go to if he was upset, that was never going to change, but Charlie was very understanding and considerate, and a benevolent person to talk your issues out with on bad days.

Right now the two had been talking for about an hour and a half, chatting about their day, what they planned to do the next morning, Nothing _too_ deep. But Alastor knew why Charlie had brought him out here alone. And he _dreaded_ it. 

“I really think you’ve come a long way, Al.”

‘ ~~Gee, thanks~~.’ He bit back the sarcastic remark and the urge to roll his eyes and instead looked down at his hands folded neatly in his lap.

“Thank you.”

“I know things have been tough, even if it’s starting to seem better. We’ve been holding off this talk for a long time, I think it’s best if we just discuss-“

“No.”

Charlie paused, looking at Alastor with wide eyes as the demon adverted her gaze, turning away from her with a small stubborn huff.

“I’m not saying that in an indignant way, believe me darling, I just don’t think we have anything to discuss.. I know you think I’m still hurt but I’m not, I’m better, I feel better.”

“Al, You keep saying that but how can I be sure if you don’t tell me what your _actually_ thinking? I know when your lying, don’t think I don’t because I can see, I _know_ you.” 

Alastor sighed and pulled his knees up a bit, leaning back on his arms and looking up at the dark crimson sky, the bright pentagram above never dimming as the bell tower chimed loudly in the distance. 

“What I feel... darling I honestly don’t know, but I’m not confused.” He chuckled, closing his eyes. 

“I... I feel numb. Like every feeling I’ve endured over these past few weeks, I-it’s like it was nothing. Like it didn’t even happen. I don’t remember feeling those things, but I..”

He sighed shakily and looked back down, opening his eyes again to gaze at his claws. _They were coated in a glossy red substance, making a spike of anxiety to flow through him, disappearing when he blinked and the dark crimson was gone_. He swallowed thickly. 

“I do. I remember feeling it but it’s like it doesn’t matter. I don’t care.” He looked at Charlie, his eyes watery but his smile still up.

“I don’t care. I don’t feel bad, I just feel.. _nothing_. I’m not mad, or sad, or even _confused_ , I-I just feel _nothing_.”

“Your not hurt? Aren’t you scared?.”

“I don’t believe I have a reason to _be_ scared. I’m not hurt anymore, the collars gone. Come as what may, I feel fine now. Yes, sometimes I remember it all, sometimes I still feel it around my neck, shocking me.. if I’m honest, sometimes I get scared when I’m mad, and I hate that I do, but it’s true. There’s not a point in denying such pessimistic emotions, right?”

“Right.. I’m just worried y’know? You’ve shown us _multiple_ _times_ you aren’t afraid to hurt yourself in stressful situations.”

“I can’t promise you I still won’t.. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I can’t bring myself to lie about that. It’s been a strain, yes, but...” he hesitated, looking anywhere but her. “I’m happy. I’m happy I get to be here with you all, Angel, Vaggie, husk and niffty, and you, of course.”

Charlie nodded solemnly, Breathing out a puff of air with a soft smile. She grabbed Alastor’s hands and the deer looked away as she ran her fingers across his badly scarred wrists in shame, his ears drooping a bit. 

“I’m glad your happy here. I know you might not be scared.. but I am.” Charlie said, her voice shaking. Alastor snapped his head to the demon belle when she sniffled, not moving her hands. 

“I’m sorry.” He said out of reflex, ears dropping down completely as his smile fell. Charlie shook her head, pulling the deer closer. 

“Don’t be. I’m scared for you, because I can’t tell what’s going on inside your head. I know it’s hard to evaluate yourself, but I’m so happy for how much you’ve opened up to me Al, really.” Tears fell down her cheeks and she smiled at him, making him tilt his head in confusion. She was giving off a lot of emotions right now, and Alastor couldn’t tell if she was sad, angry, or an odd combination of both.

“Oh.. thank you.” He said, slightly unsure. 

She pulled his hands up to rest of her shoulders as she pulled him into a hug, to which he gratefully reciprocated, still a bit confused, wrapping his arms around her fully, Charlie doing the same around his middle. 

“You’ve grown so much, I’m _so_ proud!”  She said, her voice still watery. 

Alastor felt a twinge of excitement flare in his chest, for what, he didn’t know. Something about making Charlie happy, or proud made him feel good. He’d chase that feeling and go out of his way to make her proud again, especially if he got such wonderful praises in return. He smiled and hugged her tighter, pushing against her as Charlie giggled. 

“ _Really_?” Oops. He hadn’t meant to say that out loud, and he felt his face heat up after it had came out. Charlie pulled away and cupped his cheeks with her hands. She chuckled. “Of course, silly! Look-“ 

Charlie dug into her pocket and pulled out a sticker. The overlord tilted his head, a bemused smile on his face. She peeled it and stuck it on his red button up shirt with a wide smile. 

Alastor looked at his shirt after she stuck it on, giving the sticker an odd look. It had a sparkly pink cat on it with the bolded words “ _meWow_!” Below it. 

“For a good job!” She said, her hand on her hip while the other booped his nose. He blinked at her and grinned. 

“I’m speechless.” 

“As you should be. But really, You’ve really grown Al, I really am very proud.” She said seriously, smiling at him before standing up, reaching a hand out to help the deer up also. 

“Thank you, Charlie. You were right, talking did indeed help me, I feel a lot better.”

She pulled him in for another hug, one he wasn’t expecting, so he flinched a bit before settling in and hugging her back, patting her head awkwardly. 

“That’s great! I’m glad. Now let’s get inside, it’s getting late.”

She pulled away and grabbed his hand, leading him to the gardens exit, going into the back side of the lobby.   
He didn’t think she really needed to hold his hand as much as she was, but he didn’t resist, opting to let the princess have her way with him. He didn’t mind much. If she were anyone else they wouldn’t _have_ a hand anymore, but Alastor felt oddly.... _safe_ with her..

“Oh my gosh you too took forever out there! Your dinner could’ve gotten cold! Good thing I just finished making it right now and your just in time! I was about to call everyone in!” Niffty said all in one breath, waving to them as they entered the kitchen.  
The little ball of energy walked out and called everyone in, before running back in and setting the table in the blink of an eye.

Vaggie and Angel walked in, taking their respective places at the table just as husk entered, plopping himself down lazily in his chair with a bottle of vodka firm in his grip. 

“Hey Smiles, how was your lil’ talk?” Angel said, sitting beside the deer with a smile. 

“It was fine, very enlivening.” He replied, grinning wide. The two shared a laugh as Niffty served their food, taking her seat when she had finished. 

“Thanks Niff! Looks great.” Angel praised, digging into his plate. 

“Your welcome!” She sang out happily. 

_ Alastor paused and looked at his plate blankly, his smile falling for a few seconds as all the sound around him cut out and his vision turned monochrome. His ears rang with static as all around himself. things started to fizzle out of sight before- _

“I like your sticker, strawberry.” 

_ Huh? _

Alastor looked down at his shirt, then to his side as Angel spoke, his ears flicking up to his voice. 

“Are you mocking me?” He said, narrowing his eyes. 

“Nah! It’s cute!” He laughed, pointing at it with a large grin “Very. MeWow.” He said with a giggle. “Wish _I_ had one.”

“Yes well you’ll have to earn it, like me.” Alastor said with a smirk. Angel snorted and took a forkful of food into his mouth. 

“Heh. Maybe I will.”

The ringing had stopped when Angel spoke, and he looked around the dinning room, his ears perked and smile genuine. 

This was nice. 

Everyone was eating, happy and content. 

_Alastor_ felt content. With this- this was great, something he looked forward to every night. 

So what if he felt numb sometimes? At least he could feel numb with people he loved, right? When he was with them, he didn’t even feel numb, so it was a win win. 

He felt completely comfortable here, like it was his new home. And he was happy with that. 

He wouldn’t feel numb anymore. 


End file.
